After the Story - Choices Like Rivers - Episode 34
After the Story - Choices Like Rivers - Episode 34
This podcast discusses each chapter of Choices Like Rivers and each episode is posted directly after the book episode. This corresponds to Chapter 12 Section 3.
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A long overdue reunion. Their love, their fierce love for each other never died and with them in such close proximity to each other the embers are threatening to quickly rekindle the flame.
Sharon is working hard to resist the urge to forgive Will. She is spending all her energy to fortify the wall around her heart. But chinks are falling and the wall is beginning to crumble.
We are about to hear the story we have been waiting for. The story about what happened to the baby she was pregnant with when she was with Will.
We can assume that she did not have an abortion. She was so adamant about that. But sometimes we do the very thing we make a strong vow against. Sometimes, we are forced to do what we vow we won’t.
Or maybe tragedy struck in another way. Maybe she died. It has been seven years and so many things could have happened.
It is difficult for Sharon to answer Will’s questions regarding the hearing for guardianship. She is so defensive and on edge about her inferiority as a guardian that she snaps at each question and fears the worst when discussing what others will say.
There is also a seemingly small group of people around her. Leslie seems to be her only friend. Yes, she has some casual acquaintances, such as the lady at the dry goods store. But, they don’t really know her.
The people she works with know her best. But do they truly know her in a casual friend sort of way? Do they really know how she conducts herself when not at work?
Sharon is 27. I can see a person being this isolated at a much older age, maybe 60 or 70, but not in your twenties. At that age you want to be out and meeting people and going places. You want to be in the thick of it. I venture to say that you have more friends, both casual and close, in your twenties than any other time. But not Sharon.
She has suffered several tragic events in her life. But, they are not things that can’t be overcome. However, Sharon refuses to attempt to overcome even one so with each event, not only is she working to endure it, she is building upon the gaping wound of a previous time.
Her spirit is depressed and when you are in that state, it is easier to stay home, to stay isolated. She has lost all desire for life, to experience the fullness and joy of living.
Not only has she pushed herself into a hard spot of isolation, she doesn’t even realize it. She blames so many things on the pain she feels not knowing that she herself holds the key to unlocking that door so she can move forward.
When you are in this type of place that Sharon is in, it is truly hard to move forward, to break free. The desire is gone. The energy to do anything beneficial to your heart health is non existent. So, you are stuck.
Baby steps. If you are in this type of place, take baby steps. Do something new. Do you like to read? Join a book club.
Do you like the movies? Ask an acquaintance to go to a movie with you. An acquaintance that you don’t know well. It could just be a one off good time, or you may never know, it could be the start of a new and fruitful friendship.
Do you like sports? Join a bowling league or tennis league. Do something. One thing. Give it a try and you may like it. If after a time you don’t see any benefit or you just don’t enjoy it, then just stop doing it. Try something else new.
At the very least you won’t be at home all alone dwelling on your pain and your perceived injustices which only grow in your mind the more you dwell on them.
Promise me that today you will take at least one baby step. Just one.
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